Sobering fact

Good morning. It is just after 9am here and I've been awake for about 4 hours. I'm feeling good but a little sleepy.

I had a rough week. Chemo doing it's thing, lots of vomiting and other unpleasantness. I've had much love and support getting through the days...but I've been in such pain, it really makes it hard to function on any given day. That same pain that makes me feel bad also makes me grateful to be alive. And I am so grateful to be alive.

So I'm in pain, so what. I take pain meds. Said pain meds make me sleepy. Sometimes it seems like all I do is sleep. I have to accept this for now. My body needs rest to heal...and I want it to heal.

This coming week I am off chemo.  A whole blessed week off. Sure there will be medical appointments, etc...but I can do that. Sure I can. 

Five weeks on, one off. This for a year. Until they stop seeing any improvement. Or I die.