Here i am again

I am really feeling like my old self again these days. The shock and sadness over losing my aunt and the impact of all of that has lessened but only just. It is not that we were terribly close, i'm sad to say...but i did feel her loss. As a child, my family and hers were often together and i guess i've been mourning her and thinking about those days. Such is life.

Tim has been wonderful throughout...being loving and caring and spending as much time as possible together. What a wonderful man he is. We've been playing together online still...our latest games of choice, chess and canasta. Thank goodness for Pogo...we spend countless hours there, playing and talking voice....sometimes talking up a storm and other times one or the other or sometimes both of us are quiet...but it's okay because we are together.

He has been puppysitting for his brother's dog the last little while and it has been so neat to hear him interact with her. Her is Millie and he sent me some photos of her, i forget what kind of dog she is (sorry, my memory is being affected as of late, darn tumor) ...she is darling but a bit of a handful apparently. She is also a bed hog and poor Tim hasn't been getting a lot of sleep. Today she went home, so maybe he'll take a nap when i do.

On Monday i started a new schedule for my chemo....and today i went in for treatment only to be told i couldn't have it, due to an infection of my bladder, as it turns out. I'd been sick yesterday, could barely get out of bed...well, quite honestly i didn't get out of bed much at all yesterday. I slept and slept. To say i was tired is an understatement, i was just plain exhausted...chemo just really has this way of taking it out of you. My appetite comes and goes...sometimes i barely eat and other times i can and do. I've noticed a difference in my memory and so has my doctor. They do some tests on me to test me as far as memory and recall, etc. He isn't surprised that i am struggling to come up with words. I've told him that i blog but have gotten away from it lately and why...he suggested i resume as it would be good for me to work my brain...so here i am. Please forgive me if i make mistakes with my words...if i use the wrong ones...or maybe even something might not make sense...we'll see what happens. I'll do my best not to let it show...wherever possible.

Well i am tried so i am going to lay down for a nap...i will write again soon...and soon i hope to stop by all of your blogs and check in with you, i've really missed reading you.

Jamie